Let’s Have THE Talk

Oh yeah… I’m bringing IT up: weight gain (and why I blame it on the marathons).

One year ago I was about 10 pounds over my happy weight. I blame it on the transition from being a student running around working two jobs to being a 50-hour-week lazy that spent her whole day in front of a computer.

Then in July I left my job, moved to Orlando, went vegan, became dedicated to training for the marathon and biking and slowly lost my 10 extra pounds. I know I hardly mentioned it on the blog, but I felt great. I was more comfortable in my own skin than ever before. I was training hard, watching what I ate and my healthy (and leaner) body reflected that.

Then came marathon #1, Thanksgiving, Christmas and marathon #2. Welcome back, 10 pounds and the inability to fit into my favorite clothes.

Sure, marathon training means tons of exercise, which makes weight maintenance (or even loss) very attainable during training. It’s the two weeks before and the two weeks after the race that will get you! Your marathon appetite is still alive and well, but your exercise decreases considerably- more than running 26.2 miles in one day can make up for.

I’m ready to get back to that healthier, leaner version of me. It’s better for my clothes, my speed and my energy level.

I exercise plenty, so I know it all comes down to what and how much I eat.

The kicker of it all is that I am least motivated when I have weight to lose. When I’m at my happy weight I see and feel the motivation to eat healthy. Silly, right?

I need to eat cleaner- and less! I’m going to work on choosing fresh fruits and veggies for snacks and watching my portions at meal times. Now more than ever I’m going to shoot for including most or all of my meals on the blog.

Speaking of running… meet my new friends: Brooks Trance 9’s! I’ve had them for almost two weeks and they’re heavenly. My glass slippers :)

How do you deal with weight gain? How do you motivate yourself when you don’t feel so hot?

2010 Eve

Hola! Happy Last Day of 2009! I started off the day with naner oats and a glass of OJ.

Lunch was leftover vegan Mac ‘n Cheese, cherries and carrots with hummus. Mmmmm.

Tonight David and I are going to his boss’s house for a partay!! Can’t wait. I just need to find something to wear (from my closet of course)!

Around this time last year I outlined some goals for 2009. My main goal for the year was happiness and simplicity. I think those two words were successfully key to my year.

I’m proud to announce I met all of my 2009 goals!

Run another 10K and half marathon.- Check and more! I ran 2 5ks, a 10k, 15k, 2 half marathons and full marathon!

Have more get-togethers with friends.

Volunteer.

Try new recipes in the kitchen.- Going vegan helped with this!

Make whole foods my habit.

Open up to more yoga and Pilates.- Yoga is now a huge part of my life!

Spend more time with God and in the Bible.

Always look for the positive and have fun.

Cherish and spoil David and my family more.

Dedicate time to invest in healthyashley.- In 2008 I had 213 posts and in 2009 I had 236. Works for me!

Get to a weight that's best for me.- I set a “stay under x” goal. Thanks to the holidays I’m a few pounds over, but that will change!

2009 was a tough but wonderful year. I quit my job; moved to Orlando; adopted Jack, Dixie and now Sabrina; went vegan; became a personal trainer;  and ran my 1st marathon.

Overall I learned to be content with who I am and to love life and trust in God. I learned to breathe through yoga and pushed my limits with distance running.

  For 2010 I’d like to continue the happiness and simplicity theme. I’ve also outlined a few more specific goals:

Run 30 miles.

Complete a century race (100 mile bike ride).

Keep my weight under X.

Maintain a healthy, balanced vegan diet.

Set aside specific time to invest in David, my family and friends.

Make a move to enhance/change my career.

Choose happiness.

Next Big Challenge

Last September I set myself up for a big challenge and completed it. I trained and ran my 5K, 10K and half marathon!

Now I am setting up (or revisiting..) my next challenge: weight loss. It's really gotten out of control. I am now 9 lb.'s higher than I've been most of my life and 12 lb.'s higher than where I want to be.

I exercise and eat mostly healthy, but the weight has continually creeped up. I know where I fault: afternoon snacking, too many sweets and eating too much with David or when there's a lot of food around.

But I want to lose this weight to feel better in my own skin, run easier and fit into all my great clothes (that are currently out of commission).

Weight loss has always been like running was for me- the "it's great that others can do it, but I am just not made to do it" mentality. Well I proved that theory wrong with my half marathon, so now it's time to tackle my weight.

It makes sense that if I eat less and exercise more I will lose, but something inside me won't let that register. Something inside me says eating 5 chunks of chocolate doesn't matter anyway since I'm not going to lose.

So I'm heading into this half-blind.

Starting today I am counting calories (1,400-1,600) and eating most of my starchy breads and high-carb meals in the early part of the day without thinking too much about it or focusing on what I weigh right now.

My weigh-in this morning showed me a new, bad number, but that's only feedback. My short term goal is to get back to my normal weight (9 lb.s less than I am today). After that I would like to trim off another few pounds.

Here I go!

ps- I signed up for my next half- the Gasparilla Half Marathon March 1st! I'm going to train with a great girl I met on my last half!

Just Left the Starting Line

After a week of food-centered events and overly-sugared treats, I am seriously suffering from a food hangover. I feel cloudy and have no energy! I am left with a sleepy Ashley and a stuck scale.

I want to clean up my diet and lose some of the mental cloud and physical chub. I have to do this right now.

In 15 days I run my first 10K.
One month from tomorrow I graduate.
The next day I am (hopefully!) road-tripping up the East coast.
In 2 months I run my first Half.
Not to mention the holidays!!!

I need to feel and look my best for all of this!

So I'm changing things up a little.
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My ideas of how to lose weight have been evolving lately. More than ever I realize it's not about any big 'secret' or 'trick'. For me it comes down to calories, food choices and happiness. If any of those are out of place I get off track. Silly rules and limitations won't do it. Weight loss really is simple. You might not be used to seeing happiness as a tool for weight-loss, but when I am happy I want to do good things for my body. Happiness means that I don't have to turn to food for any sort of fulfillment.

______________

To keep me going each day I'm turning to some guidelines based solely on my lifestyle and habits and what works for me. Bookmark this page, people- I'm going to need your help!!

1. Blog every day. Even if it's just a short update, I think posting how I did that day will help keep me in check.
2. No snack after dinner unless it's a 100-cal post-workout snack.
3. Don't add snacks to eating schedule. (Breakfast, snack 1, Lunch, snack 2, snack 3, Dinner + pre/post workout snacks if necessary) No standing in the kitchen with a spoon and a jar of pb!
4. Morning snack always to be fruit. I've realized that my morning snack sets the theme for my day. I need that to be one of health not HFCS!
5. For a while, don't by any questionable products. For me, questionable products are those that I might overeat/binge on (crackers, cookies, CEREAL, trail mix). We have to learn our own weaknesses.
6. No 'pieces' of snacks. Either I'm in or I'm out. Ha! How many times do I unwrap a bar planning on just having half and saving the rest for later and instead eat the whole thing!? This also relates to #3.


I'm hoping for at least a pound gone each week, but I'm not setting any specific number goals or end date. I'm going to be rigid about this until I feel clean and until I fit comfortably into my favorite Seven for All Mankind jeans. I think that will be about 137, but I'm focusing more on me than a number. I've been 147 all this week.

Stay tuned, lovely bloggers. For my sanity and scale, please stay tuned!

When Maintaining is Not Enough

I shouldn't be writing this. I am frustrated and severely lacking motivation. But I work hard to make this blog real- all of my ups and downs in striving to be "healthy ashley." So I write tonight to represent women who are frustrated when their hard work just doesn't pay off.

Tonight I used the LifeCenter at my gym (a small booth that measures and tracks weight, cholesterol, heart rate, body fat, etc.) before my appointment with my personal trainer. End result: the numbers are the same as two months ago. All the numbers are the same. Even body fat- so it's not like I've just "gained muscle."
I feel great. I'm happy and strong and feel tight all over (woohoo!). But I am over the weight I should be. I don't fit into my normal jeans-- and I really don't fit into my skinny jeans.

So I get new workouts from a personal trainer every week, exercise as much as I can, limit my calories and eat mostly whole foods. Yet I maintain. It pisses me off.

Really I know I need to hit the calorie range 1400-1500 each day and I will lose, but right now I'm really upset that the things I'm doing already should be working... yet nothing changes at all.

So tonight I cut my workout short, ate a bowl of cereal and am going to bed without cleaning the house.

So when you're fed up and need to quit for the day, it's okay. You're not alone. Tomorrow I will think of my half marathon in January, how strong I am from my new workouts and the nutrients I consciously put into my body each day. But tonight I am pissed that every stupid number stayed the same. And my jeans still won't fit.

Dear Self

Yes, the scale was up. Don't act so surprised.

Inspirational notes everywhere, a personal trainer, fresh produce, fancy workout gear and plans galore will not get you to your goal if you don't put the effort in with nutrition. You know the calorie range that makes you lose. You know that that is what makes progress.

So if you continue to sneak that extra snack in at work because you're just so hungry or if your post-workout snack turns into a sampling of the entire kitchen, you will gain weight. Follow the plan (even when it is a little tough) and move toward the right direction.

You can do this.

Friday Quickie

Considering the 12 page paper I have due in, oh... 3 hours, we're going to make this quick! Just a few things:

*Buy 1 smoothie get 1 FREE? Oh yes! Sign up for an email newsletter with the following links to score this sweet deal for Jamba Juice and Smoothie King!

*I am addicted to running. Seriously, I want to do nothing else other than run. Rain, shine, busy street, whatever! I can run on Bayshore by the water and then into the city with high-rises and historic buildings and back home! At night I stretch thinking of my run and during the day I plan it on mapmyrun.com. Too addicting. Just the other day I ran 4 miles. My next goal is 6! I have it all mapped out! :)

*An added motivation to stay addicted to running is the scale going down! Every day for the past 5 days it has gone down .2 pounds! Some days my eating has been really heavy (too many of those stupid cookies we talked about, the best huge grilled cheese sandwiches), but I work really hard on my run and viola! The scale and I have a nice little thing going on. I really didn't want to speak it- it can't be jinxed!

*Tonight, stretch before bed. Or turn up your favorite song and dance for 5 minutes. Chase the dog down the hall. I promise you will feel great!

* I am going to this tomorrow! And to see this tonight!

Bye! :)

Woah Boy!

Has it really been this long? How have you all been!?

Monday after work I moved into my apartment, Tuesday-Thursday I was away for work, Friday I got my car towed, Saturday I moved the big things into my new place and Sunday my car got flooded. It has been one fun, expensive week!

The new apartment is just perfect. I now have this uplifting environment that allows/challenges me to be whoever I want to be. Before I was so influenced by commuting 2.5 hours each day, my family troubles, my sibling’s poor eating habits… they were all tumbling against me to keep me down. I was binging often the past few weeks, I had cake every day before breakfast and after dinner, and I was so stressed out and tired by the time I got home from work at 7:30 p.m. that I just couldn’t work out. I was feeling terrible.

The first week after my move I hadn’t counted a calorie or stepped on the scale- or even had much time to exercise! But from being in this environment and wanting to just be healthy, I stepped on the scale and my weight had dropped down 3 pounds. I just know this apartment is good for me.

(my first time in the apartment!)

(a sneak peak! pictures to come!)

(first broken plate!)

One thing my landlord failed to mention to me was that my street floods easily. (oops!) This building has street parking as well as lots in the back and on the sides. I always park in the street because it is closest to my apartment. Last night (after hail larger than ice cubes), David looked at the window and said, “Look- my car is under water.” Well, it turns out mine was too.
The street was a river. Water was on my seats. Notice the water bottle floating in the picture below. Water even came 6 steps up to the first floor of my building. Fun! Both of our cars were towed and we’re waiting for the diagnosis from the shop. I’ll keep you posted.

There has been a very limited internet connection at the apartment. I’m working on it, but I’m getting something now, so hold on! Check back soon, because we have a lot to talk about! (And lots of pictures!)

I have so many things I want to discuss with you all through this blog... I’m getting right on it!
Have a healthy, happy day!

Wait a Second...

.. didn't this blog begin with me committing to get to my goal weight (now revised to 136)? Oh yeah...instead I gained 4 pounds that will not leave me.

I've had a series of ups and downs, all coming close to (but never actually hitting) my start weight (no, not goal. STARTING weight) of 144. I've made lots of improvements, really. But my weight remains up. And this weekend it got worse.

Thursday I was doing really well. In spite of having plans to go out to eat with friends every single day of the week, I was exercising, eating right and feeling great. And then it happened.

Thursday
9:00pm- Close to my starting weight. Feeling great... set my alarm for early next morning to run...
10:00pm- An unexpected, no control moment with a big bowl of full-fat ice cream. And a second bowl.

Friday
7:00am- Scale shows +2. I know I didn't gain 2 pounds, but I feel horrible about how I let myself down. I was this close.
7:10am- No workout- I feel like crap. Weekends are busy and food-packed for me. Losing my motivation on Friday just sets me up for disaster. But I took responsibility, scrambled up some motivation and did pretty well eating wise. I even crammed in an awesome intense run.

Saturday
7:30am- Scale shows +1. "What the *^@*^?!?!?"... "It's okay. Just remain calm and kick butt. You'll see a good number tomorrow."

Sunday
7:24am- Scale shows +.2. It's Mothers Day. I can't let this get me down.

Sunday
6:55am- Scale shows +1.2- a number I have NEVER seen before. Up 5 pounds in 4 days? All motivation gone. Gone.


All my life I maintain at 144 (always doing weights and eating 90% well), and now this? It is not just a number. It is my body, my confidence,. my clothes, my fitness, my success, my health. And right now I feel like crap all around.